we're drinking on jet streams-Friday, Jul. 02, 2004 @ 2:48 a.m.

come with me as we fall into... the twilight zone.

the most fucked up things have happened this past week. making out with two random guys, an email from an old friend, an email from a married man that wants me, oh and i forgot about the bouncer that wants to take me out to subway for lunch because he has coupons, and tonight, to fucking top it all off, the ex, james, and his bitch were exactly where i was tonight for my nephewís birthday. random, random, annoying, fucking shit. this all needs to stop. the universe needs to right itself and STOP FUCKING WITH ME.

let me explain about the guy from work. married guy. 45 year old married guy. 45 year old married guy with a 16 year old kid from his first marriage that likes me, apparently, who i have absolutely no attraction to. well, he sent me this email last night:

Hi Mary,†††Finally came up with the courage to write to you. this time I hope to send it , so if you get this you will know . that I this have my balls. I know that we just left work . I should have told you then, but when I look into your eyes the words escape me, and Stand there like† idiot .And im left with nothing to say. So here it goes.Mary you are the MOST BEAUTIFUL GIRL IN THE WORLD TO ME ! BUT PLEASE HEAR ME OUT . I know that you do not wont a†relationship. And that you wont to see other people. hey, that cool i've been in one for eight years. but we go maybe once a week. or once in couple of weeks. I would like to think that we have some of the same interest. Like opera, the theater, I hope that you like Stephen King, Dean Koontz,Anne Rice, Robin Cook. Just to name some of the author's that I enjoy. So Mary I must make this short.†BUT I just wonted to tell you that I like you. Hope you fill the same to. If not please let me know.†Because i'm looking forward to next week. IF you wont to talk call me at 000.0000. see you soon†

iíll probably end up seeing him at work tomorrow. heís usually off on fridays, but tomorrowís pay day and he just has to come in a pick up his pay stub. i donít want to confront him tomorrow about his totally inappropriate email. i need some to think about what to say. so, what iím going to do, if i see him, is tell him i didnít get it, if he asks. which wouldnít be a TOTAL lie, because i really almost didnít get it. for some reason a lot of my emails have been going into my junk mail folder, and thatís where his was. if i hadnít checked my junk mail, which i only do every so often, i would have never gotten it. iíll still talk to him, i just need to buy some time.

i havenít heard back from david. i have a feeling i may not. i unloaded a bunch on him in that email and i donít really know how heís going to take it. but itís no loss at this point. a few emails over the past month is all the talking weíve done anyway. he stopped speaking to me in real time a while ago. as for the bouncer, iím sure i can just ignore his calls until he stops. iíve told him iím not interested in doing anything, but he didnít seem to get that.

as for the two guys from this weekend, no one has mentioned them really. the family friend has been forgotten about, and the random guy from friday i havenít even seen and hope to never again. i forgot about the part where we were at the bar and he grabbed me by the hair shoved his tongue down my throat. jake reminded me of that tonight.

the nephews party was a blast. erica and i beat my brother and the birthday boy on the go kart track. as for seeing the ex and the bitch, it didnít really bother me. i know it bothered them though, because when i walked outside, the stopped playing their golf game right in the middle of it and went inside. how fucking petty. i wasnít going to say anything to them. i didn't even look at them or acknowledge that they existed. but it did give me a sense of satisfaction to know that i made them terribly uncomfortable.

canít wait until saturday. maybe all this crazy shit thatís been going on is just to tease me for the really awesome saturday night iím going to have! i so have to see mr. saturday night at the show and i so have to get him to take me home again. i need a good night of sex.

previous <-----> next

i'm trying - Tuesday, Apr. 26, 2005
... - Wednesday, Mar. 30, 2005
- - Tuesday, Aug. 31, 2004
baby doll lips - Friday, Aug. 20, 2004
unwanted hiatus - Thursday, Aug. 12, 2004